David tells us about the care his dad Gerard received from Martlets and the special memories the family have of spending time with him on the inpatient ward.
“There was something about Martlets that always felt calming and comforting right from when we walked through the door. They did so much more than just managing the medical side of things and really listened to what Dad wanted and to us as a family. It was summertime and Dad’s room opened on to the gardens which made such a difference as he loved to get the sun on his face. I remember we all loved the jacket potatoes from the café and Mum would still go back there after Dad died to have one. It was a small thing, enjoying that comfort food, but it made a difference to our day when we came to visit and we still remember it now. My family was there every single day for several weeks, so we got to know faces and names. All the staff from the cleaners, cooks and volunteers to the receptionist, the nurses and the doctors were so kind and supportive. After Dad passed away, it was a comfort to us knowing that he spent his final weeks in such a compassionate environment.
Dragonflies will always remind us of Dad
We spent time in the Sanctuary at Martlets which was a peaceful space to rest and reflect. There was a book in there called Water bugs and dragonflies which helped us explain the process of dying to the younger children in our family. It was written for children on the theme of transformation, but I loved the symbolism. It had a spiritual tone to it without being religious.
On the morning Dad passed away, something beautiful happened – there were dragonflies in my garden hovering around. I was sitting there trying to process everything and suddenly this dragonfly just appeared. I don’t have any water features in my garden and I know dragonflies are attracted to water, so it seemed odd that it would appear out of nowhere. Every time since then, around that time of year, dragonflies turn up again, which is probably coincidental but it’s a lovely way of remembering him.
We also commissioned a big mural recently of a dragonfly for the tenth anniversary of Dad’s passing – it’s about halfway up London Road in Brighton near Circus Parade. It was done by a local graffiti artist whose work we liked. I also came into Martlets with my mum and sister and we hung a beautiful stained-glass dragonfly outside in the gardens in memory of Dad. It was made by a staff member’s mum at Martlets. It was a beautiful way to mark the anniversary and to reflect on Dad’s life. Dragonflies will always remind us of Dad thanks to that special book we read in the Sanctuary at Martlets. It’s a memory we’ll treasure.
Dad was an inpatient at the Hospice before the new renovations, so when we visited it was great to tour the new facilities and to physically see how fundraising can make a positive difference. All the new patient rooms open on to the gardens, there’s a family room, a new Sanctuary space and a new rehab gym and counselling rooms. The new facilities will help so many more families like ours to access support, and to make special memories with their loved one during those final days and weeks.”
Published: 05/06/2025